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Tuesday, February 2, 2016

10 habits of extremely boring people


We fear boredom — that we might be bored or, even worse, bore others.

One example: For a 2014 University of Virginia psychology study, participants gave themselves electrical shocks to avoid sitting alone with their thoughts for 15 minutes. In a similarly themed Quora thread, users discussed what makes people boring. Here are the highlights, so that you can identify the bores in your life and avoid becoming a bore yourself.

See if you are a boring waste of life here 


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Before my breathtaking love affair began with the SHLBGS, I was with a young lady who ended up being boring as hell in every direction once I moved her out to California with me. Her idea of fun was staying home on Saturday night and doing crossword puzzles as we watched Golden Girls marathons. She'd sneak a Lifetime Movie in on me from time to time too. Jesus, I thought about ending my life a few times as I sat through those, with her smiling in approval at me the entire time like I enjoyed the shit... I'd have rather shaved my nether region with a rusty dull straight razor and sat in a pool of isopropyl than have to go back and do that all over again... 

We lived together for a year in California before the inevitable happened. She thought it'd be a good idea to just go ahead and take off back to Texas from California and leave all of her shit for me to haul back to Texas for her, along with my stuff once I EAS'd from the Corps. She didn't say "hey, would you mind hauling all of the shit that won't fit in my car 1700 miles back to Texas for me and I'll chip in on the rental truck and gas for the rental truck?" She just kind of expected it I guess because I'm a nice guy and I don't tune women up physically or verbally because my mama raised me better than that. She also didn't say she was leaving to go back to Texas. So, I get home one afternoon from Camp Pendleton and find the note that said "Sorry about this, you just don't respect me anymore, take anything I have to say serious, or consider me valuable to yourself. You're this big bad insensitive asshole Marine with all these asshole Marine friends that you'd rather hang out with instead of me on the weekends. I can't take it anymore, I feel so alone. I'm going back home today..." 




Oh no! Woe unto me, let me tell you... It was one of the greatest things that ever happened to me. Yes, I hauled her shit home. Hold on, I'm getting there... And the chick even had the gall to ask for the $400 deposit on the apartment, even after all that! She was broke, I was not. 

So I hadn't even been home in Texas but for a few hours, and Mama's phone rang. Guess who? Yep, you already know. "Look, I know you just drove through 22 hours straight and you're probably really tired right now, but do you think you could get around to bringing me my stuff today?"

Now think about this for a minute... I drove 22 hours straight because I wanted to get home and be done with the West Coast and the Corps for a while. I had been thinking about how I was going to give this ungrateful depressing Pisces woman her shit back the entire time. 



I just kind of played her off and made her wait until I could get enough rest to get my head back on straight. I went to her mom's house where she was living since she took off without notice on me. I backed the Hertz truck up in the driveway. She came out and was trying to be all nice and shit and chatting me up like I just didn't haul all this shit home for her for free.



The door rolled up and the first thing out of the back of the truck was a huge piece of glass that went on the coffee table that soon followed it to the pavement. Next, the bed and mattress came out in excellent winter olympic ski jumping form, long and arched toward the broken glass and table pieces. Next up were the boxes of clothes that made excellent shot-puts. There were dishes, lamps, and more lovely breakable shit as well. I was able to make a mini Mount Suribachi out of all of it and if I'd have had a guidon to stab right in the middle of it with a victory flag attached, you had better fucking believe I would have. 



I gave her the deposit because I didn't need it. I was smart enough to save money and hide it from her just in case she pulled some shit like what you just read. Follow your intuition and listen to what your instincts are telling you. Always have yourself some "Me money" stashed away in case you need to make some moves and let people think that they've got you pinned down and it's hurting you. When you pop up shining like a diamond in a goats ass, they won't know what hit them...

 

(added after original post, I forgot this part)
Within 3 days of all of this shit happening, I had my own place set up and was rocking and rolling into the free world of bachelorhood once again. Guess who sees me at the bar and comes over to apologize, wants to make up, get back with me and move in together again and this and that and blah blah blah blah freaking blah? Yep... So would you like to know what I did? I took full advantage of her naivety and took her home with me for the night to my new place and let her think she was right back in the saddle with your boy here. You know what I'm saying dudes... Let's just say she was in for a rude awakening over the next week when I didn't answer her stalkerish phone calls and demands that I call her immediately. Oh the taste of victory is so sweet isn't it? It even got to the point of where dudes I grew up with were mad dogging me and trying to hem me up on dogging her out like I did. Who are you bro, Captain Save-a-ho? Get out of my face with that bullshit. Since you love her so much, why don't you let her jump on your train to whereverthefucksville and deal with that depressing and mooching shit...

It did take a while for some of them to come back around years later and say they were wrong for trying to get in between me handling business my way with her.  I have never had issue with completely cutting people off and that's exactly what I did out of principle. If I cut you off, it's more than likely that you handed me the scissors. 

It wasn't but a short time after that when the SHLBGS put that love cunja on me and I've been under her spell ever since... We've known each other our entire lives, since we were kids. It all worked out for a reason. It always does. 

This concludes story time for the day. I have so many crazy stories that I could tell about my young life if you fine readers showed your interest. I wouldn't mind providing you with a laugh or two. Just let me know... Have a great day heads!

10 comments:

riverrider said...

that was the funniest shit i read all day.so how did she take it?

Stackz O Magz said...

RR, there wasn't much she could say at that point. I'm nice until it's time to get ugly. I have not lost a wink of sleep over the deal either.

taminator013 said...

Dude, if I didn't know better I would think that Wirecutter wrote this. Keep 'em coming, brother..........................

Stackz O Magz said...

Thank you Taminator. I posted a while back that things would be improving as far as quality and what have you. I'm on some next level shit at the moment and you are witnessing Stackz off the chain. I'm glad you enjoyed. Thanks for the support.

mbumgua said...

Keep the stories coming if you can! Thanks for the great read!

Jive Talkin Tool said...

Love it--share more please!
Huge props on the delivery method.

Stackz O Magz said...

Thank you for your support. I'm sure more are to come, just have to find the time. Thanks again.

Stackz O Magz said...

Thank you JTT! I had a few hours of windshield time to conjur that up. Thanks for your support.

millerized said...

Amazing how shit just works out, ain't it?

Stackz O Magz said...

Indeed. Things have a way of doing that sometimes. Send me an email sometime Millerized. I'd like your opinion on a mods and mod business ideas that I have in the works. I know you don't do anything you're good at for free, so give me a price for your advice if you need to. Thanks for your support and reading here!